One day, I asked my Yiayia why I have so many freckles and no one else in my family does, she told me it was because one sunny day I sat in front of a screen for hours. I believed her, and I still kinda do.
I love when you get a little closer and I can see all your pecas.
Something so special. Something you can hardly see through a camera lense, but in the right morning light shows the scattered constellation of manchas where the sun hits the harshest.
During a rare midday video-chat, there was one second when time stopped and said “I love your freckles,” as I lost my breath wondering if that was what I truly meant to say.
It was.
The detail from a good camera creating a mirage of closeness. When really distant communication, dreams, and moments like this are all I’ll have. Pues, the brief moment I catch a glimpse of your pecas is the moment I’m tricked by distance and remember a time, when our faces were less than inches apart and I could see every little freckle you bare.
Then in my rendezvous dreams, I visit that time with you and nothing in between. When I can see all your pecas with a naked eye. The illusion of closeness that a camera creates-defeated by my imagination. No vistazo needed.
Each time I don’t see your pecas secretas I count it as a loss. A reminder that both freckles and memories fade into the distance. I check my phone a second time, looking for a response and when there’s nothing there, I decide to mute all my conversations, but yours. Stopping myself from the false momentary excitement from others’ messages. And learn to not admit to loving anything else unless, you do too.
While Writing: A Kiss to Build a Dream on by Luis Armstrong
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fHjZQb-kGek
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